Princess and The Frerg
One fine evening a lovely princess put on her bonnet and clogs; and decided to take a walk by herself through the woods. In her hand she had brought her favorite toy; a golden ball, which she enjoyed throwing into the air and catching.
She gave the ball a particularly good toss this time and failed to catch it, the ball rolled a considerable distance away into a spring. "Dang it!" she yelled, "Of course I would miss and the ball would roll into the spring. Oh well I'm a princess I can just get another one because my dad is the king and has a lot of money." So she kept walking.
As she was about to pass the pond a frog jumped out. "Hey foxy mama give me a kiss!" yelled the frog while making vulgar body gestures. "Oh my god what? A talking frog? What is this?" the princess screamed as her eyes did cartwheels and her jaw did pushups. She could not believe it, she found a man trapped in a frog's body, probably for giving a witch the same treatment he was giving herself.
She ran towards the frog. "Aw yeah baby here we go!" yelled the frog as he leapt at her only to be swatted down to the ground and knocked unconscious. The princess picked him up and made her way to the local market grounds, and gave the frog to a pet vendor, who kept him as his own as he was old and hard of hearing, so he interpreted all of the frog's English speaking as vague "ribbits", and called named him Chives.
The princess then left for her home, where she took a pretty long and satisfying nap, and wrote a flirtatious letter to the hunky prince she had the hots for the ruled the next town over. They later got married happily, and had frog's legs at the reception's dinner.
Fin
The anti-climatic ending is what did it for me. The frog prince is a dastardly being and you portrayed him as such, just what the audience desires.
ReplyDeleteA comma after "baby" in the dialogue, in the fourth paragraph would be nice.
I'm just gonna say that those frog legs most certainly came from Chives. Also, I like how you said her eyes did cartwheels and such. Very cartoonish. And next time you meet a frog, be sure to teach it some manners, or it might end up being the meal at a wedding reception.
ReplyDeletePlease donate to SaveARudeFrogFromBeingEaten today.